I Am (Not) Afraid

I like to say I have an active imagination. Others just say I’m a fraidy cat.
A story told through my reactions to various movies…

The Hand that Rocks the Cradle
In 8th Grade my sister had a friend over and along with my mom we watched The Hand That Rocks The Cradle. They all sat on the couch and I laid on the floor in front of them as we watched. My sister’s friend had already seen the movie. Just when one of the most intense moments happens (the alarm clock goes off), the friend got my mom and sister to grab my shoulders and shake me from behind. Scaring the bejeezus out of me. I screamed. Jumped all the way up to standing in .0001 seconds. Nearly passed out. I probably did permanent damage that I should explore in therapy. This is the first time I can remember a scary/thriller movie nearly killing me via heart attack.

Jurassic Park
A few years later while I was in high school (Go Pirates!), my mom and sister took me to see Jurassic Park for my birthday over the summer. I. Was. Petrified. Those dinosaurs were freaking terrifying. I sat there teeth chattering, shivering, jumping in my seat every time a dinosaur did something nefarious. Which is like every 30 seconds in that movie. Meanwhile my mom and sister noticed my extreme fright and giggled and laughed at me. Whatever. I was really really really engrossed in that damn movie. And dinosaurs can KILL YOU. Even via heart attack, apparently.

30 Days of Night
Marc was leaving SF to move to New York. We decided we should go watch one last movie together. He gave me options. But it was his going away movie. So I let him pick. I didn’t investigate the options. At all. I should have. I didn’t know it was a vampire movie. Much less a fucking two-hour heart-stopping gore-fest thriller. And what’s crazy about this movie is that the scare scenes are creatively executed to make you think it’s going to be scary, then it isn’t and you let your guard down, and then BAM… HAHAHA WE SCARED THIS PISS OUT OF YOU WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE OK. Like literally. I think I pissed myself that night in the movie theater. The first dozen or so times scary things happened I almost jumped out of my seat into Marc’s lap. Mostly bc it’s a particularly fine lap to jump into. Also he owed me for taking me to a scary movie. I left the theater vowing to never watch a movie again without thoroughly vetting it.

So yeah. I get lost in movies. But when I get lost in scary ones, I am SO TOTALLY NOT OK.

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